She Can Heal Podcast

Ep. 37 - The Healing Power of Emotional Self-Care

• Keila Aldea, LCSW • Season 2 • Episode 37

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Feeling constantly overwhelmed, irritable, or emotionally drained? You're not alone. For most women, emotional self-care feels like a luxury when it's actually essential for survival. In this illuminating episode, we unpack what emotional self-care truly means—and spoiler alert: it's not about bubble baths or temporary escapes.

As we explore the foundation of emotional health, you'll discover how even two minutes of conscious awareness can shift your entire emotional state and prevent burnout before it begins. We examine why setting boundaries isn't selfish but necessary, how physical movement can transform emotional distress, and why reaching out for support demonstrates courage rather than weakness.

Throughout our conversation, we break down five practical strategies that don't require hours of your time or expensive retreats—just moments of intentional presence with yourself. From journaling to mindful breathing, you'll learn accessible techniques to incorporate into even the busiest days. We also address the connection between physical and emotional health, exploring how they influence each other in ways that impact your overall wellbeing.

If you've been pushing through negative emotions, operating on autopilot, or believing you should be able to "handle it all" without support, this episode offers a permission slip to prioritize your emotional needs without guilt. Remember: you can't sustainably care for others unless you first care for yourself. Ready to transform your relationship with your emotions? This conversation is your starting point.

90-day Self-Growth Journal - A great companion you can use on your healing journey. For 90 days you will have daily prompts on the topics of self-love, self-care and gratitude.  This journal is great for beginners, novice and anyone that wants to dive deeper into their true selves.   https://amzn.to/4fk14sq

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Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome to the she Can Heal podcast, a podcast aimed at helping women heal and thrive emotionally, physically and spiritually. I am your host, kayla Eldia. I'm a licensed therapist and a self-care advocate that is passionate about helping women take back their power and help them realize they're important, worthy and deserve the care and attention they give to those they love most in their lives. This show is meant to help inspire you on your healing journey, no matter if you're in the discovery phase and are just realizing that you have unhealed wounds, habits and mindsets that are keeping you stuck in your life, or you've been on this journey for a while and are looking for inspiration, encouragement and or new tools to help you continue on your healing journey. My goal is to help you realize that you can heal from all that life has thrown at you and are capable of evolving into your healthiest and happiest version. On this show, I will provide you with resources, tools and insights to help you heal and thrive emotionally, physically and spiritually, because you deserve all of that. So if you're ready to ditch the guilt and make yourself a priority, then you're in the right place, because the truth is that you can't pour from an empty cup, even though most of us do this on a regular, and we really need to stop that nonsense. So get ready to be inspired, motivated and equipped to truly thrive. Hello, and welcome back to another episode on the she Can Heal podcast. Thank you so much for joining me today.

Speaker 1:

Today we are going to continue our self-care conversation and we are going to hop into the topic of emotional self-care. So part one we talked about what is self-care and how it helps us to build resilience. Part two we talked about physical self-care and everything you need to do to take care of your body and what the benefits are. And today we're going to go into emotional self-care. So in today's episode, we are going to talk about what exactly is emotional self-care, why it's really important for us to take care of our emotional self-care needs, and then we'll talk about some practical ways that you can incorporate emotional self-care in your day. So we will go over all of this in today's episode, so let's get started, all right. So what exactly is emotional self-care?

Speaker 1:

An emotional self-care involves caring for your emotional needs by first identifying and feeling them. As a result, you're going to become more in tune with your mind, your body and your spirit, and when you take the time to address how you're feeling, it allows you to connect with yourself on a more profound level. While some emotions are unpleasant and unsettling, neglecting them will cause them to fester, and, as you begin to master the art of emotional self-care, what you're going to realize is that it's not necessary to sit with those feelings that don't serve you. Instead, all that's required is just to simply acknowledge their presence. This is a key factor in managing our emotions, which is all we really need to do is acknowledge and be aware of them, but we don't have to sit with them. We don't have to let them just stir inside of us. So think of it as conscious and intentional practice of taking care of your emotional and mental health. So, again, it's all about recognizing, understanding and responding to your emotions in a healthy and a constructive way. It's about being proactive rather than reactive when it comes to how you feel, and it's about acknowledging that our feelings are valid and deserve our attention, just like any other aspect of our health.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so that is what emotional self-care means, and, again, it's not about ignoring your negative emotions or pretending that they don't exist. That's a key thing that I do stress with most of my clients right. It's not about dismissing what you're feeling, but instead, emotional self-care is about creating space for all of your feelings the good, the bad and the in-between and then also learning how to navigate them without being overwhelmed or allowing them to control you. Okay, that is very, very important. So now let's talk about what are the benefits of investing time and energy into your emotional self-care. In today's conversation, you are really going to understand why it's so important and the advantages are huge, and doing this work really giving yourself the time and energy to take care of yourself and your emotions is going to be creative. It's just going to be a big impact on every area of your life. Ok, so let's go over three different key areas that I think are really important when it comes to your emotional self-care and the reasons why we really need to do this work. So number one is that when you care for your emotional needs, this is going to boost your overall well-being and resilience, and resilience is key here, and we talked about that in the beginning when we talked about why self-care builds resilience.

Speaker 1:

When you practice emotional self-care, you become better equipped to handle your stressors, challenges and difficult situations. You essentially develop this strong inner core that helps you bounce back from setbacks. Okay, and here are the different ways. So, number one it helps you to handle stress better, because when you do practices like mindfulness, meditation, journaling, it's really going to help your stress response, preventing it from overwhelming you. You know you're going to become better at identifying your stressors and implementing healthy coping mechanisms. It's also going to help you navigate challenges.

Speaker 1:

So emotional self-care fosters self-awareness. It allows you to understand your emotional triggers and your patterns. This understanding empowers you to approach challenges with greater clarity and emotional stability. It also helps you deal with difficult situations because when you prioritize self-compassion and setting healthy boundaries, you protect yourself from emotional drain and manipulation. You also develop the ability to navigate difficult interactions with greater confidence and assertiveness. It helps you also to increase your self-compassion because when you treat yourself with kindness and understanding, you're essentially fostering a sense of inner security and it reduces self-criticism and you increase also your self-trust. It also is going to improve your emotional regulation because you're going to gain greater control over your emotional responses, which is going to allow you to react to situations in a more balanced and constructive way.

Speaker 1:

I will say this one right here is key, because when you are able to give yourself some space to process and sit with and notice the emotions that are coming up from a difficult situation. You might give yourself time to journal it out, to go for a walk, to really breathe through it and just sit with those emotions. It's going to help you so that you can address what's happening with more clarity, instead of letting your emotions really judge the way that you're going to respond to a situation. Bouncing back from setbacks is another really important skill that you'll learn from doing this work, and the combination of self-awareness, self-compassion and emotional regulation creates a really strong inner foundation and this is going to really help you to recover from any setbacks that you encounter more effectively, and you're going to learn from your experiences and it's going to help you to move forward with greater resilience right. So, in essence, emotional self-care is an investment into your well-being that pays dividends in your ability to lead a more balanced, fulfilling and resilient life.

Speaker 1:

Let's move on to number two. Number two is caring for your emotional need is going to help to enhance your self-awareness and, through emotional self-care practices, you're going to learn how to gain a deeper understanding of what your triggers are, your patterns and your needs. This self-knowledge is incredibly empowering and this is where you really start learning more about yourself, because when you're able to understand your triggers, you understand the patterns that you usually go through with your emotions and your relationships usually go through with your emotions and your relationships. It's really going to help you to learn what you need to change, what do you need to do more of. And this self-knowledge can be just really, really empowering for us to really trust in ourselves and just feel emotionally stable within ourselves.

Speaker 1:

And the way that it does this is number one it promotes introspection and emotional self-care, involves the practices that encourages reflection, such as journaling, meditation, mindfulness, and these activities create opportunities to examine your thoughts, feelings and behaviors. That's what introspection really means, right? It's just like being aware of our thoughts, our feelings, so that we can understand ourselves more. And by regularly checking in with yourself, you become more attuned to your emotional state and the factors that influence them.

Speaker 1:

For me, emotional self-care this is the part that has helped me the most, which is learning about myself, my thoughts, my feelings, how things affect me, the thoughts that I have about how people treat me, and then this has helped me to understand that so that I can help myself more through those situations and really disengage from those really unhelpful beliefs and thoughts about myself, and I've done that through journaling and meditation. Also, this practice of emotional self-care really is going to help you to identify your triggers. So, through these practices, you're going to begin to recognize patterns in your emotional responses. You're going to be able to identify, like the situations, the people, the thoughts that trigger specific emotions, allowing you to anticipate and manage them more effectively, such as what happened to me. It also helps you recognize emotional patterns. So emotional self-care is going to help you understand how you typically react to different situations and this awareness is going to help you to break negative patterns and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

Speaker 1:

Like I just shared, that has definitely been something that has really helped me in so many ways. It also helps you to foster self-compassion, and self-compassion is a core component of emotional self-care because it's really learning how to treat yourself with kindness and understanding really learning how to treat yourself with kindness and understanding. And self-compassion helps to reduce the self-criticism and it creates a safe space for exploring your emotions without judging them, and self-compassion is something that can really be helpful, especially when you are dealing with a lot of self-criticism, if you're in that comparison trap and really coming back to yourself and giving yourself the words and the actions that you need to really help yourself to get through those moments with just a gentle and kindness manner. It also enhances your emotional literacy. So by engaging in emotional self-care, you're going to become better at identifying and labeling your emotions, which is absolutely so important. And this increased emotional literacy is going to allow you to communicate your needs more effectively and build stronger relationships.

Speaker 1:

And I think this is another really key area, because what I've noticed with the clients that I work with is that they don't know how to communicate their needs to the people in their lives, but a lot of times it's because they don't know what they truly need. And this is why it's so important to take the time to really get to know yourself more and to really increase your self-awareness, because how can you ask for what you need if you yourself don't really know what it is that you need? And that's going to be a big issue in relationships, because you're going to be frustrated, you're going to be upset, you're going to probably just isolate yourself or avoid situations because you're not getting what you need. But you're not getting what you need because you haven't built a skill of knowing what is it that you need, so that you're not getting what you need. Because you haven't built a skill of knowing what is it that you need, so that you can communicate that to your family and friends.

Speaker 1:

Okay, number three is that when you care for your emotional needs, it is going to reduce the risk of burnout and mental health issues, and so, by proactively addressing your emotional needs, you're going to be less likely to experience chronic stress, anxiety or depression. It's a preventative measure that can significantly improve your quality of life. This is huge. This is so important. As a therapist, I can tell you that this is one of the most areas that people struggle with. The most is that when I don't know how to take care of my emotional needs, or when I don't make the time, I do have higher levels of stress and burnout and depression. So emotional self-care is a very powerful tool in helping you to get through burnout and to mitigate your mental health issues.

Speaker 1:

Okay so, first, reducing burnout. Burnout often stems from prolonged and excessive stress, right? So emotional self-care practices such as mindfulness, meditation, deep breathing, will help to regulate your stress response, and by managing your stress more effectively, you can prevent the accumulation of tension that tends to lead to exhaustion. Also, setting boundaries is another big piece in this. It's that emotional self-care really emphasizes the importance of setting healthy boundaries, which involves knowing your limits and saying no when necessary, and so setting boundaries is going to protect you from overcommitting, prevents this depletion of your emotional resources. It also is going to help you to prioritize rest and relaxation, because burnout is often characterized by a lack of rest and recovery, and emotional self-care and courage. Prioritizing activities that's going to promote relaxation right, such as hobbies, spending time in nature or just simply taking breaks such as hobbies, spending time in nature or just simply taking breaks. These activities are going to replenish your energy and it's going to help prevent emotional fatigue. Promoting work-life balance is another one. So emotional self-care is going to help you to create healthy balance between work and personal life, because when you dedicate time to activities outside of work, you reduce the risk of becoming overwhelmed and emotionally drained.

Speaker 1:

Emotional self-care also mitigates mental health issues. So it's going to help reduce anxiety and depression because the self-care practices, such as journaling and going to therapy it provides an outlet for processing those difficult emotions, and these practices are also going to help reduce your feelings of anxiety and depression by promoting emotional release and self-understanding. It's also going to help you improve your mood and your emotional regulation, because you're going to be engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, right Like hobbies and social connections, and those are the things that are going to boost your mood and promote emotional well-being. It also helps you to develop emotional regulation skills, because it's going to allow you to manage your emotions in a healthy way, right by being aware of them and learning how to work through them in a way that's going to be good for you. It also enhances your resilience, because when you practice emotional self-care, it's really helping you to build resilience, which is the ability to bounce back from adversity, and a strong inner core developed through self-care is going to help you cope with life's challenges and reduce the risk of developing mental health issues.

Speaker 1:

It also fosters self-compassion, because self-compassion is the key component of emotional self-care. It really helps people to treat themselves with kindness, especially during difficult times. This helps to reduce negative self-talk and feelings of isolation. This is another big one that I see that I'm constantly encouraging my clients to really treat themselves with gentle kindness and being really compassionate, Because when you are being really self-critical or when things are getting really tough and you feel like you're not doing a good job at it, you really have a really hard time of coming back to yourself and saying you know what? Let me take it easy on myself, let me give myself some compassion, let me give myself some grace, because I'm going through a lot right now. And that's a really important part of emotional self-care, which is really practicing that self-compassion, really giving yourself that grace and gratitude for all that you are doing and acknowledging that you know what, right now things are tough and it's okay if I can't do the best in these areas.

Speaker 1:

And lastly, it promotes better sleep, because many emotional self-care practices, like meditation and reducing your screen time before bed, improves sleep quality and good sleep is very important for mental health. This is another area that I see a lot with my clients, which is a lot of people just struggle with sleep because they just have a lot of difficulties in their lives. Either they're going through some type of depressive episode, they're going through grief, they're overwhelmed, and really when you don't make time to sit with your emotions and to do this work, it's really going to be very hard for you to get good quality sleep, which then is going to repeat the pattern. Right? If you don't get good sleep, you are going to struggle in a lot of different areas the next day. Okay, so those are all the key areas, right? The key benefits to practicing emotional self-care and creating a space for yourself so that you can be with your emotions, you can notice them and you can help to notice all the patterns and all the things that are really not serving you and making you feel good emotionally.

Speaker 1:

All right, so now we're going to move on and let's talk about how do we actually do this right? Where do we actually do this? Where do we start when it comes to meeting our emotional self-care needs? And so I'm going to talk about five key areas that I think are really important and really areas that you can focus on to begin your journey. And I just want to, you know, say ahead of this is that this information is not so that you can beat yourself up, because I know when, sometimes we hear this information and we say, oh my God, like I'm not doing any of this, I am terrible, I am not good at this, I treat myself really, really bad and this is too much and it makes you feel even worse.

Speaker 1:

So this information is not, and it makes you feel even worse. So this information is not so that you can beat yourself up. This information is not so that you can use it to hurt yourself. Instead, this is information for you to learn from and for it to encourage you to take the steps you need to do if you feel that you are not doing a good job at managing your emotions, for whatever reasons. And so it's all about listening and getting inspired, and then you can then think for yourself what is it that I need to do? What steps can I take to begin to be better with, you know, taking care of my emotional needs? And remember that it doesn't start with doing everything at once. It starts with just identifying maybe one or two places that you can start with, and that's going to help you to begin the practice of doing a good job at taking care of yourself.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so number one is practice self-awareness. Okay, this is the foundation of emotional self-care. So taking time each day to check in with yourself, asking yourself how are you feeling, what emotions are present, and some of the activities that you can do are journaling. This is where I started my emotional self-care journey was journaling, and journaling, for me, was really really helpful, because I was able to take the space every single day to ask myself that specific thing how are you doing today? Because if you think about it, who's asking you this question? Not many people are asking you how are you doing today, and even when people ask you, you're not going to specifically tell them like I feel, like I'm failing today or I feel fat today, right? You're not going to say that to people, right? And so when you're able to give yourself time each day to write down how you're truly feeling in this moment can really help you to gain awareness into you, know what your thoughts are, what you're feeling about yourself, so that you can start to be more present with yourself and engage in activities that are going to be helpful to you. Right, journaling is a really great one.

Speaker 1:

Mindfulness is another great place to also work on, which is doing mindfulness exercises, because mindfulness is all about noticing what's happening in this present moment and so many times you know it could be every single day just pause and say how am I feeling right now, how does my body feel, and this could be a really good way for you to be more present with yourself and help you to almost like pay attention to yourself and give yourself what you need. And this is important because sometimes, when we're not, when we're so much on autopilot which I've been in there for many, many years you don't really understand that you are experiencing overwhelm, you're feeling stressed, you're just pushing through and you're not giving yourself the space to really like check in with yourself, so that in that moment you can say, like I'm really feeling stressed right now because of how much work I have, or because I have a many you know a lot of appointments, or the house is a mess or whatever it is, and you can say I need to just sit here for a minute and just breathe. And that's where the self-compassion can come in, right, um? I had a client who was going through a really difficult emotional time and we literally just pause and we had we practice a self-compassion umion exercise which is basically you kind of just give yourself a hug, right, so you cross your arms and you just hold yourself there. I learned this from a book on self-compassion. The book is called the Proven Power of being Kind to Yourself Self-Compassion by Kristen Neff, and in the book. She mentioned this activity and my client was having such a difficult time with just being with herself and just being critical of things that she felt she should be doing, and we literally just paused and we did that and it felt so good. I know I did it myself and just giving yourself your hug and just being with yourself can be so grounding and it could be so like helpful to you in that moment, because it's a moment that you can say you know what it's hard right now, or I'm overwhelmed right now, or I'm stressed right now and I'm just gonna sit here and just I'm just gonna breathe and I'm and this is where the self-awareness comes, where I'm noticing that I'm feeling stressed and so I'm just gonna give myself maybe some 10 deep breaths. Or in that moment I'm going to go for a walk for 10 minutes and I'm just going to focus on, you know, the sun and the fresh air. And you know it's like giving yourself those moments to pause and to take care of your emotional needs in that moment is very, very empowering, no matter what it is, no matter if you say, in this moment I need to take some deep breaths, I'm feeling stressed, I need to go for a 10 minute walk. I'm going to sit down outside with this cup of tea and I'm just going to sit there and just focus on just drinking it. So it can just help me.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes it could be as simple as just sitting down, closing your eyes, to just get all the stimulation away. Close your eyes for like two minutes and just focus on your breath. Or close your eyes and just stretch your arms and stretch your legs and stretch your neck and breathe, and that, right there is you taking care of your emotional needs. It's you noticing that I am feeling stressed, I'm feeling overwhelmed? Maybe I'm just noticing that my mood is really low right now. Maybe I'm feeling some irritation. I'm just noticing that my mood is really low right now. Maybe I'm feeling some irritation. I don't know where it's coming from.

Speaker 1:

This happened to me many times and instead of saying, oh well, I have to keep working, I have to keep doing this. That's not going to help you, because now you're dismissing what you're feeling, you're saying you know what. I need to take a two minute break and just sit here with myself, or I'm going to go outside and do all those different types of activities that we just talked about. This is so important. So practicing self-awareness and then giving yourself what you need in that moment can do so much good for you.

Speaker 1:

I've done this, I practice this, and it's it's the ability to get off of autopilot and to really sit with yourself and notice when you're feeling different emotions physically, emotionally, spiritually because you know what. We all have different lives and from time to time we're gonna feel physically exhausted because we're doing a lot of housework or taking care of the kids. Sometimes we're going to feel emotionally exhausted because of stressors that we're going through. No matter what it is, you being able to notice it and saying this is what I'm feeling right now. I'm noticing my body is really feeling tired, I'm feeling like I am feeling overwhelmed and I just need a minute and listen. We can all give ourselves a couple minutes, as many times as we need during our day to take care of ourselves, and that's where we kind of talk about like plugging ourselves in or filling our cup. That's what it is and, as you can see, it doesn't have to be anything that is so time consuming, right, because we always think self-care is time consuming. It really isn't. It's all about saying I'm not good in this moment, and you know what? I need to take a minute. I need to take a minute, and I am so sure that if more people did this, there would be a lot less fighting, yelling conflicts, saying things we don't mean because we can say to ourselves I'm feeling really upset right now. I need to go outside and cool down for just five minutes. I'm going to go for a walk, um, you know what? I'm going to go make myself a cup of tea, I'm going to sit in my my porch and I'm just going to sit here, and so this is what we're talking about when we talk about practicing self-awareness.

Speaker 1:

All right, let's move on to number two, and number two is another really important one that I see over and over and over. It's happened to me as well, and it's setting healthy boundaries, and this one's more about personal boundaries. Right, it's learning how to say no to things that drain your energy and that they don't align with your values. How many times do we take things on? Do we say yes to things that we know is not good for us, either adding something onto our plate or doing something that truly doesn't bring us any type of joy? That's a big one is learning for yourself to say this isn't going to be good for me, you know, um.

Speaker 1:

So it's about protecting your time, your energy by establishing clear boundaries in your relationships and at work. You know, no matter where it is, um, sometimes it's taking on more than you can at work just because you want to. You know you want, you don't want your boss to get upset at you or you don't want your coworker to get mad at you, and so you take it on, even though taking on that extra work, that extra client, whatever it is, it's going to make you feel so much more stressed and it's going to make you feel more depleted and it's just going to make your plate really, really heavy. And so, really, you know, setting those boundaries really involves limiting your exposure to negative influences or taking breaks when you need them, like we talked about earlier. So it's really saying I think setting healthy boundaries is also within ourselves.

Speaker 1:

So, for instance, if I have five things on my to-do list, so, for instance, if I have five things on my to-do list, right, it's not really pushing myself because I'm going to be really overwhelmed by it. It's really setting those boundaries for yourself and saying there's five things that I really need to get done. But what are three things that I know, reasonably, that I will get done, and then the other two I can push those to the next day, you know, so that you're not taking on so much that you are just going to be completely depleted. Sometimes it's saying no to invitations that you really would like to go to, but you are just not feeling up for it, for whatever reason. I know that's a hard one, right, because you do want to spend time with friends and family, but you just don't have the energy, or you know that going there is just going, being around certain people is just going to deplete you. And so setting boundaries like that is so important. And I know it's not easy.

Speaker 1:

Not easy to set boundaries with ourselves. It's very it's really not easy to set boundaries with ourselves. It's very not. It's really not easy to set boundaries with the people in our lives, um. But at the end of the day, even if people get mad at you, um, even if people you know make comments or judge your decisions, you really are living for yourself and you really have to do the things that make you feel good, because what's the point of saying yes to all these invitations and, you know, loading up your to-do list and taking on extra stuff at work because you want to look like you know you can handle it all, and then it leads to you burning out or at least to having really you know bad fatigue. It leads to um, your health being affected by this because you know, um, being stressed is really bad on your body. Or you take on extra work and then you don't have time to take a lunch break. Right, it's not good for us, it doesn't help you in any way, and this is another area that can be really helpful in you feeling better emotionally, all right.

Speaker 1:

Number three is prioritizing your physical well-being. We've learned all about our physical self-care last week, but our physical and our emotional health are deeply interconnected. I always tell people your mind and your body are constantly communicating. Your mind isn't functioning over there by itself and your body's not functioning by itself. They really do connect and so when you are getting enough sleep, when you're eating nutritious foods, when you're engaging in regular activity, for instance like exercise, is really really good and it's such a great way to release pent up emotions and boosting your mood. It's just really understanding that when you take care of your body in a healthy way, you are going to feel so much better. I don't know how many times I hear from clients that they're not getting enough sleep, they're struggling to feel focused, they're struggling to feel energetic because they're just not getting enough sleep. They're struggling to feel focused, they're struggling to feel energetic because they're just not getting enough sleep, for whatever reason. It's learning that when you can exercise, when you can move your body, when you can stay in action, that is really going to help you to feel better.

Speaker 1:

Going for a walk because you are having a tough day can be such a great way to release tension from your body, because you're breathing in the fresh air right, you have the sunlight hitting you, you're moving your body. It really has all these positive effects because it creates all these endorphins to make you feel good. Sometimes doing like a yoga stretch If I'm really stressed or maybe like I'm just having, I just feel very tense, for whatever reason, I will literally just do a couple of yoga stretches. And this I can do it right in my chair, right, I'll just stretch my arms, my shoulders, my neck, I might get up and I might stretch my legs out, and the release that I get from that is so good, and there's a lot of other types of physical movements. So if you're really feeling upset, if you're really feeling tense, there's all these physical movements that you can do to really release the the, the cortisol, right, the adrenaline from your body so that your, your, your, um nervous system can kind of reset itself. And sometimes that might just be just jumping up right, just jumping, doing pushups, doing jumping jacks, um, putting on some music and just dancing, um, that will make you feel so much better. You're going to release all of that negativity from your body. And so just realizing that when you take care of your physical self, when you take care of your body, it actually does make you feel emotionally well, it makes you feel more relaxed, it makes you feel more calm, it helps you to release any tension, it helps you to release stress. So just understanding that both of those do work together, your mind and your body. They are one, and so when one is not okay, the other is also not okay. And so making sure that we understand that when we prioritize our physical wellbeing, we're also helping our emotional self-care as well.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so let's move on to number four engaging in activities that you enjoy. This is one that I'm personally really working on, because when you make time for hobbies and when you make time for activities that bring you joy and that you truly love and they just make you feel good and they make you feel relaxed. And this could be anything from reading a book, right, if you're a bookie and it's just finding that book of the week that you can sit down at the work or at night and on the weekends and just curl up on your sofa and just read this really good book with your nice cup of tea could be so relaxing and calming. Listening to music is another big one, right, it's just really putting. I always tell my clients you know, create a feel good playlist, you know, find songs that just put you in like such an uplifted mood and put them on and just move around and dance and just listen to them.

Speaker 1:

Spend time in nature is another big one that, if you truly connect with nature that's me. I love going for a walk in the park, I love going for hikes. It's just so nice to be out there and look at nature and things like that that nature in itself is very grounding. It's pursuing a creative outlet and that's where I'm at right now, where I'm really trying to disengage from the doing, doing, doing and doing more of crafting. I used to be such a big crafter. I used to love to create. Big crafter, I used to love to like, create things and all like and, you know, get so creative, and that has fallen to the wayside and it's really something that I really want to pick up on.

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Connecting with your friends, your loved ones, so really doing things with your family, going out for fun activities like bowling, and trying different activities that we all really enjoy. Going on vacation is something that I'm totally looking forward to. I'm going on vacation with my family pretty soon and I'm so looking forward to it, and the part that I'm looking forward to the most is just to spend time with them because, as we all know, we're all busy and sometimes we don't always have so much time to spend with our family and friends. So, really just connecting with people and these are activities that are going to provide a much needed emotional recharge, right, these are the activities that are going to fill your cup, right. Again, this is when we're plugging ourselves in so that our body doesn't drain. It's really engaging activities that make you happy, that make you laugh, that you truly enjoy doing.

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One of the things I usually suggest to clients is creating a list of things that bring you joy and aiming, especially when you're having a tough day. Going through your list and saying what is it that I can do off this list? That's going to put me in a really good mood, that's going to like help to boost that. You know, those feel good emotions, um, and if, whatever that is for you engaging in that, for you know 10 to 15 minutes, that could be such a good way to recharge and to, like you know, uplift yourself. All right, so we've reached our last tip, which is seeking support when needed, and this is another such important one.

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I mean, I don't know how much I hear about women who just don't ask for help. They think that I'm bothering people. They think that nobody I don't want to like burden anybody and we need to stop doing that. We really do. You know it's learning how to reach out for help when you're struggling and no matter what it is emotionally struggling, maybe you need help with, you know, housework and you need help with the kids, anything like that Like we really need to get into the habit of asking for help because we don't have to do it all and we don't need to be struggling on our own.

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Again, this could be talking to your best friend or a good friend or someone you trust or a family member. Right, you're holding on to something. Maybe you can talk to someone who maybe you think could really just hear you out. Maybe you need to talk to someone and get their advice on something. Maybe it's joining a support group. It doesn't always have to be. You know people in our you know small circle. Sometimes it's reaching out for other types of support, like joining a support group or even going for um, you know, professional help, like a therapist to really work through whatever it is that you're working through. I know I have been going to therapy myself for many years and it has been absolutely, um, so helpful in just learning about myself and understanding patterns, but also like having someone that you can trust to share, like your really, really biggest issues and problems and thoughts and feelings, and you know that person is just going to hold that space for you. They're really going to help you, they're going to make you feel safe and they're going to help you through whatever it is that you need.

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And again, remember asking for help is not a sign of weakness at all. It's really a sign of strength and so also understanding that people in our lives do want to help us. How many times have I heard from family members who said I wish she would have just talked to me, I would have loved to be there for her. Or they say she would have just talked to me, I would have loved to be there for her. Or they say you know, my mom, my aunt, my brother, my sister, my best friend. They got mad at me because I was struggling and I didn't ask for their help.

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So seeking support, asking for help, is an absolute big one. It's something that we all struggle with, especially as women, and we have to realize that it's okay to ask for help. We don't need to do this on our own, especially when we're in a time in our lives where we're full blown into motherhood and we're working and we're trying to take care of the house and we're trying to take care of ourselves. It's okay to ask for help. We're trying to take care of ourselves Like it's okay to ask for help and it's not a sign of weakness. It really isn't, because we all need help from time to time. We are the most, the big, you know, the most successful people in the world. They didn't get to where they're at by themselves, right, they have asked for help, they have reached out for support and that is a huge for help. They have reached out for support and that is a huge, huge area for us to work on.

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So that is everything that I had to say about emotional self-care, and it's remembering that emotional self-care is not a one-time fix. It is absolutely an ongoing practice. It's about making conscious choices every single day to prioritize your emotional well-being. And again, it's about making conscious choices every single day to prioritize your emotional well-being. And again, it's about starting small, experimenting with different strategies and really finding out what resonates with you. Like I said previously, use this information to help you so that you can identify where is it that I need to practice more?

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Like I said in the beginning, for me it was that self-awareness, it was that journaling practice. It was writing down my feelings, asking myself questions. It was going for mindful walks where I'm just walking with just my thoughts and I'm just talking to myself and understanding what I'm feeling, what I'm feeling it, and that has really helped me to learn so much about myself and patterns, but really it's just remembering that we all have to start somewhere. We're not all perfect. Nobody listen, I'm not doing it all perfect, so do not even think that. Right, I struggle from time to time and I have to hit the reset button many times, and it is just part of being a human being. But understanding that this is another really, really important part of taking care of yourself. Right, taking care of your emotions and being just being there for yourself. Right, it is having your own back. It is noticing that you're struggling and doing what you need to do in order to feel better.

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And just to review the five areas that we talked about was number one practicing self-awareness right. Two is setting healthy boundaries with others but, more importantly, with ourselves. Prioritizing your physical well-being, because your physical and your emotional are deeply interconnected. It's engaging in activities you love. It's making time for play, it's making time for fun and it's seeking support when you need it, because you do not need to be doing it all alone.

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And, lastly, just reminding you that it's important to be patient and to be kind with yourself on this journey. There will be days when it feels easier than others. I am right there with you and that's perfectly okay and it's normal, and the key is to keep showing up for yourself and making your emotional self a priority. So I'm going to leave you with this. What are some small steps that you can take today to begin practicing emotional self-care?

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Perhaps you could take a few moments to check in with how you're feeling, or maybe schedule some time for an activity you enjoy this week, okay, and I want to remind you that next week we are going to continue this conversation. Remind you that next week we are going to continue this conversation. Next week, we're going to talk about spiritual self-care, which, again, it's an important part, because it is essentially the true essence of who we are, right, the presence that we are on this planet. So please come back next week so that you can continue learning and being inspired to take care of yourself. And just reminding you that we're going to wrap this up with learning how to create a self-care plan, because I'm truly passionate about helping you to make the choices, to create those habits that are going to make you feel happiest, they're going to make you feel healthy and just help you to become, you know, the very best self that you are, so I hope that you truly enjoy this episode.

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Please, please, please, if you'd be so kind. I would love to hear your thoughts, so please leave me a review on Apple podcast and don't be shy to reach out to me. You can reach me at in my Instagram, as you can hear a podcast. You can always shoot me an email if that's better for you, and I hope that I talk to you next week. Take care. Thank you so much for joining this conversation today. I hope this episode was helpful to you on your healing journey. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode packed with valuable tips and insights designed to empower you. If you found value in this episode, I'd be so grateful if you left me a review. Wherever you're listening from and share your thoughts and feedback. This really helps me to reach more women just like you. Thanks for listening.