She Can Heal Podcast

Ep. 72 - The Power of Yet: The Mindset Shift Every Adult Needs

• Keila Aldea, LCSW

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One word can turn a wall into a doorway. We dive into the power of yet—how a simple tweak to your self-talk transforms setbacks into stepping stones and helps you build habits that last without the burnout.

I share the core difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset through Carol Dweck’s research, then translate it into daily language you can use when goals feel heavy: I’m not consistent yet, I haven’t found a workout I enjoy yet, I’m not organized yet. We walk through four practical benefits—resilience, long-term learning, creativity, and motivation—and show why yet works at a nervous-system level by easing pressure, lowering stress, and keeping you engaged with the next small step.

You’ll hear real-life examples from health and wellness to routines and creative projects, including how to stop comparing yourself to experts and start comparing to your own yesterday. We move from perfection to progress, from all-or-nothing to small-and-steady, and from shame to curiosity. Then we set “yet goals” for the year: clear, compassionate targets backed by tiny actions like planning two dinners instead of seven or choosing a 10-minute walk that builds momentum. The episode ends with a one-line challenge that rewires your inner voice and invites immediate action.

If you’re ready to trade hustle for humane growth and build confidence rep by rep, this conversation is your reset. Subscribe for more tools, share this with a friend who needs gentle motivation, and leave a quick review to help other women find the show. What’s your “yet” statement today?


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SPEAKER_00:

Hello and welcome to the She Can Heal Podcast, a podcast aimed at helping women heal and thrive emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I am your host, Kayla El Dia. I'm a licensed therapist and a self-care advocate that is passionate about helping women take back their power and help them realize they're important, worthy, and deserve the care and attention they give to those they love most in their lives. This show is meant to help inspire you on your healing journey. No matter if you're in the discovery phase and are just realizing that you have unhealed wounds, habits, and mindsets that are keeping you stuck in your life, or you've been on this journey for a while and are looking for inspiration, encouragement, andor new tools to help you continue on your healing journey. My goal is to help you realize that you can heal from all that life has thrown at you and are capable of evolving into your healthiest and happiest version. On this show, I will provide you with resources, tools, and insights to help you heal and thrive emotionally, physically, and spiritually because you deserve all of that. So if you're ready to ditch the guilt and make yourself a priority, then you're in the right place. Because the truth is that you can't pour from an empty cup, even though most of us do this on a regular, and we really need to stop that nonsense. So get ready to be inspired, motivated, and equipped to truly thrive. Hello my friend, and welcome back to the She Can Heal Podcast. I am so excited to be here with you today, and we're gonna continue this motivation, this inspiration for this new year because we are in that mindset of we are gonna become this new, better version of ourselves by changing our mindset, changing our habits. And today I wanted to bring you a concept that I think could be so helpful to you. I know this is something that's used with kids in school, but us adults can also really learn from this, and it is called the power of yet. If you've never heard that before, this is going to be something that I know is going to help you to look at things differently, look at yourself differently, look at your capabilities differently. All right, so we're gonna start with defining what the power of yet is so that you can understand why I wanted to talk to you about this today. Definitely a mindset shift that we can all use, but I'm going to talk to you about what this is. So the power of yet is a concept rooted in the work of Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck, who developed the idea of the growth mindset. I'm not sure if you've ever heard of the growth of a growth mindset, but she developed that idea in its simplest form, it's the realization that your current capabilities are not your permanent limits. So Carol Dweck, who reframes limitations by adding the word yet to statements, signifying that your skills and your abilities can be developed through effort, perseverance, and learning rather than being fixed traits, which helps build resilience and opening possibilities for future growth. So a fixed mindset is when people believe that their abilities are static, their abilities are not changing that this is who I am and this is who I will always be. They don't believe that they can change, they don't believe that things can be more flexible. For instance, I am not a runner, right? Or I am not good at this, I am not an organized person, versus a growth mindset is where people believe that they can improve. So this is where the power of yet can be really important. So it can look like that, right? From I am not a runner, which is a fixed mindset, to I am not a runner yet. I am not good at this can turn into I am not good at this yet. And so what it does is it opens the possibility, right? So using yet bridges the gap, suggesting that your current inability is temporary and a stepping stone to your future success. Saying to yourself that I haven't learned this yet because I've never done this before. And if I keep practicing and practicing and practicing, I am going to get better, right? I'm not this is not something that I'm never gonna get better at. I'm gonna if I keep trying and trying and trying, I will get better. So it's that mentality from I'm not good at this, and so I'm not gonna do it, to I'm not good at this yet, knowing that if I put in the work, if I keep trying, if I keep learning, I am going to get better. So here are some of the benefits. Number one, it increases your resilience because it encourages you to bounce back from setbacks. So again, when we start using the mentality of a growth mindset, we are not going to say I messed up or I failed at this or I've done this and I'm not getting better, and then we stop. Why? We say to ourselves, hold on, I know that if I keep trying, I'm going to get better. It's gonna get easier, but I'm not going to give up on myself just because it hasn't worked out or because I feel that this isn't easy for me to do. Number two, it fosters long-term learning. So it promotes seeking new challenges and new opportunities. So you are giving yourself the ability to learn, to grow, to evolve, to become into a better version of yourself, better skills. You are learning to understand that it's going to take time for me to learn and I'm gonna get better as I go. And this is gonna help you to seek out new challenges, it's gonna help you to seek out new opportunities, it's gonna help you to try things that maybe right the version of you before wouldn't try because they think that they're not gonna be able to do it. Number three, it boosts creativity. So when you have a growth mindset, it leads to more ways to problem solve. So again, you're not going to have that fixed mindset that says this isn't working out. You're saying to yourself, hold on, let me look at this differently. Let me try it this way. If this way didn't work, I'm gonna try it this way. Or I'm gonna find resources online to see if there's a better way to do it. Or I'm gonna ask around, oh, I know this person's really good at this. I'm gonna ask that person versus you saying to yourself, this isn't working out, I'm gonna stop. And number four, it empowers and it motivates. It shows you that if you keep trying, you can grow and you can make progress. So again, it's about effort, it's about resilience, right? So again, if you have this mindset that it's fixed, that things can't change, you're never going to grow, you're never going to learn, you're never going to get evolved into anything, right? You're gonna stay stuck where you are. Versus when we have this mindset, we say to ourselves, I can grow, like I'm gonna keep learning, I'm gonna keep trying, and knowing that if I do that, eventually I'm gonna get better and better and better. All right, so let's talk about why the power of yet works. So I've already told you what the benefits are, but why does this actually work? So, number one, it helps you to become a beginner. When you're starting something new, it's the understanding that you've never done this before, and that you have to actually try and try and learn and learn, and eventually you're gonna get it. I think of myself with doing podcasting, right? In the beginning, like I had to realize that I've never done this before, especially when I started to feel defeated or I started to feel that I'm not doing it right, or I started comparing myself to others. I had to remind myself that this is something new that I've never done before. And I'm going to try and try and try. I'm gonna keep doing it, I'm gonna keep doing it until I get better and better and better. And it's exactly what happened, right? My first episodes sounded really not good because I never learned, I didn't know how to do this, right? I felt uncomfortable. I it felt weird, it felt scary versus now I feel more comfortable, and so now I I've learned so much since the beginning of this. But if I would have used the fixed mindset about this, I would have given up a long time ago. And believe me, it was definitely something that I went through, but I reminded myself that I cannot compare myself to people who have been doing it for a long time. I have to compare myself to myself, right? And notice when I make growth, notice when I make shifts, notice the things that I'm learning. And so it helps you to become a beginner. Number two, it helps you to become curious. So again, when you have the idea that I haven't figured this out yet, it means that there's so much more for me to learn. And so I become more curious. I start learning, I start reading more, I start trying things differently, right? So it's all about learning that we can figure it out. We just have to keep trying different things and becoming curious about doing it different ways or finding different alternatives, right? We're not fixed on this mindset that it has to be this way and this way only. If this does not work out, then it's done. No, it's saying, you know what, let me try this out. Let me ask this person, let me look this up on YouTube, let me just try it this way so you become more curious, and that's gonna be really helpful to you in learning and getting better. And number three, it shifts you from perfection to progressing. Again, if I think back to the beginning of this, and I wanted it to be perfect, like I wanted to do it right, and I wanted to do it this way, and I wanted to, you know, and but what happened was that that's not the way things work, right? We cannot stay stuck in perfectionism because that's what keeps you stuck and you don't grow from that. It's saying, This is not perfect, but I'm gonna do it anyways, and I'm gonna keep learning and I'm gonna keep growing. And maybe I might say to myself, I want to learn how to do it this way, or I want to learn how to do it that way, right? It's learning that I'm gonna make progress and I'm gonna make progress and I'm gonna make progress and I'm gonna get so much better that before I know it, I'm gonna be mastering this goal, this skill. But again, it's shifting from that. Get out of that mindset of that things have to be perfect, and if they're not perfect, then they're not for me, or I can't do it, right? The power of just yet, like I'm not good at this yet. This isn't easy yet. The yet part helps to shift you from that and saying, I'm progressing, I'm making progress. I'm little by little, I'm getting better and better and better. All right, so the next step is why is now a good time to use this mindset? And really, the number one reason that I've decided that this is a good episode and a good topic to talk to you about is because we have just entered into a new year, which is like a reset, right? It's it's a time of the year where we're setting new goals, we're setting new intentions, we're setting new habits, and this could be the perfect time for you to utilize this mindset when you are starting new things. Number one is it helps you to focus on the progress that you can make. And by focusing on progress, like we just mentioned, helps you to identify that you are making little steps forward every single time, right? And so it's not something that you are focusing on the end result, right? So that's why it's very dangerous when we think about goals and it has to be this way, and this is what I need to reach, this is what I have to do. But in order to get better at that, we have to learn how to focus on progress, we have to learn to just focus on the things that are going well, the things that we actually made progress on, and that is going to help you to keep going and keep going and keep going. And that's why the power of yeah is such a powerful intention or a powerful mindset to use as you're beginning to set goals, new goals for yourself, or even habits, right? I'm not good at drinking water yet, but I'm learning, I'm trying, I'm getting curious, I'm trying different things. Another thing, it's a great way to be kinder and to be gentler with yourself because when we are very fixed on these ideas, it's very it makes us feel very critical. I'm not good at this, I'm not good at drinking water. So, you know what? I'm just yeah, forget it. You know, I'll figure it out someday. But today, no, I'm not good at it. Versus actually, I'm doing better than I did before. If I think about before, I used to drink very little bit of water. Now I'm drinking more, you know. I'm not where I want to be. I want to be at this milestone. But guess what? I'm going to work on where I am right now and just getting better and better and better. And this is a great way to be just gentle with yourself instead of being so critical. Because when we're critical on ourselves, it really does defeat us, it really does cause us to not want to keep going. And so if we can say to ourselves, listen, I'm doing better than I did last month. Last month I was not drinking any water, and this month I'm pretty, I'm so much better. I'm drinking this much more water, even though I'm not where I want to be. I am farther than I was where I was. So again, it's being kinder, it's being gentle with yourself, it's kind of being, you know, giving yourself permission that you're trying, right? You're trying, you're getting better. But that comes with having that mindset of I'm doing better, I'm getting better, and little by little I'm getting there. It's also a good way to shift out of failure. So when we are focused on this end result, or when we focus on the things that we didn't do well, or if we focus on, you know, not focusing on the small little progress, it's gonna feel like we are a failure. But when you think about saying, I'm not good at this yet, right? I am I haven't gotten to this goal or this result yet. It means that I'm getting there little by little by little. And so it shifts me out of I'm not failing, right? I am getting better little by little by little. So when you have this type of mindset, it helps you to keep trying, to keep going. You're hard, you're easier on yourself versus um hard on yourself, and noticing that you know what, sometimes we're not getting better, right? And so it's really identifying that, saying, you know what? I'm I've noticed that I haven't gotten better at this, and it helps you to shift out of that. I'm gonna give up on this. It's maybe saying, Let me revisit that. All right, what have I been doing? And let me try something different, let me get that little reset going and let me try it this way instead, versus I'm just a failure, I'm stupid, um, I'll never do this. It's really saying to yourself, no, I'm not a failure, I'm learning, I'm trying. This is new or this is different, and I can then shift out of that. So this year I want to challenge you to set yet goals. So instead of feeling discouraged that you haven't hit your target by February, I want you to look at your progress and say, I haven't reached my goal weight yet, or I haven't reached this desired yet, but I am stronger than I was in December, or I'm better than I was last month. Okay, and I want to challenge you to really look at this year differently because as women, we spend so much time navigating so much change and pressure and responsibilities. And I'm sure that you and I, because I know this is how I feel, I'm tired of the hustle. And so the power yet is not about doing more, it's about being kinder to yourself while you grow, while you learn. It's the ultimate tool for a healthy, happy life because it reduces your cortisol levels, your stress hormones, it removes it removes the panic of not being enough, and you are enough right now, and you have the potential to grow. Both of those can be true, right? And so this shift, this mindset shift of saying, I haven't done this yet, or I haven't reached this outcome yet, it's gonna help you to focus on the little steps along the way. It's gonna help you to say, I haven't done it yet. Maybe my goal is to lose 20 pounds, right? And maybe I've only lost four pounds. Instead of focusing on, like, oh my god, I promised myself that I was gonna lose 10 pounds, I'm a failure, you know what, I'm not good at this, forget it. We say to ourselves, I haven't lost 20 pounds yet, but I lost four, right? So now I need to lose 16 more, right? I know you know, for a lot of us that are working on our health and our wellness goals, it might be something like, you know what, I want to become good at meal planning, right? And so you might say to yourself, This month, I didn't get to meal plan seven meals a week like I really wanted to, but you know what? But I meal plan two days, right? So I'm getting better and better and better because before I didn't meal plan at all. I used to just wing it, I used to eat out a lot, and now two days out of the seven days I actually meal planned. That's actually progress. I'm learning from that because I'm learning how to do it, I'm learning how to manage my time. And so, again, it's all about really focusing on the yet, right? It's not this firm fixed idea that I failed, I failed at myself, and so I'm gonna give up on this. And what you're saying is you're giving up on yourself, and we're not about that, right? We're not about giving up on ourselves, and so the whole idea is focusing on the progress, focusing on shifting that mindset from the failure, like this is the only way that it could be to open up the possibility that I'm growing, that I'm learning, and little by little I'm getting to where I want to get to. So, as we wrap up today's episode, I want to leave you with a small challenge. I want you to find one area in your life where you've been saying, I can't or I am not. Maybe it's I'm not someone who wakes up early. Maybe it's I can't find a workout I actually enjoy. And I want you to write that sentence down and then add a comma and the word yet. Feel how that changes the energy in your body. Okay, that's a good way for you to start. So thank you so much for joining me for today's episode. Again, this is a reminder that this year we're doing things differently in order to become our best selves. We're gonna shift our mindset. So I hope that you resonated with this. And I would encourage you to share this with someone that you truly love, that you know needs to hear this information because she's someone who's also really trying hard to be healthier and happier and just being the best version of herself she can be. So thank you so much for joining me, and I will talk to you again next week. Take care. Thank you so much for joining this conversation today. I hope this episode was helpful to you on your healing journey. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode packed with valuable tips and insights designed to empower you. If you found value in this episode, I'd be so grateful if you left me a review wherever you're listening from and share your thoughts and feedback. This really helps me to reach more women just like you. Thanks for listening.